Clayton has started this new thing as part of his terrible two's stage. Nightmares. Or, at least, that's what I assume they are. He's always been the most amazing sleeper, since he was six months old. Then, out of nowhere, bam, he's waking up about every other night. And there's no giving him a pacifier or blankie to get him back to sleep. He wants to be rocked...for awhile.
Since I started staying home Monday, I took on the nighttime duties with open arms. Before, Shannon and I would switch off nights. I think he does much better at those 1:30 a.m. wake up calls! So last night, sure enough, 1:30 a.m. I hear a crying. I wait, as sometimes he goes back to sleep. More crying. I get up in exasperation, we have a big trip planned to visit my brother in Colorado Springs in the morning, and I don't want anyone to be tired. I pick up my adorable little man and rock, and rock...and no sleeping. He points to the door, and I know what he wants. Sometimes his dad takes him to the couch and sits with him there. We try that...another epic fail.
Enter in bad mommy decision. I'm exhausted, let's just lay down in mommies bed. And, we do, and he falls right to sleep. I attempt to put him back in his bed, knowing this can only mean big trouble. He wakes right up and grips on to my shoulders as though I'm about to drop him off a tall cliff. He knows...so back to my bed we go.
I'm usually a tough mom about stuff. I only let Callie crawl in our bed in utter exasperated exhaustion. I didn't let her watch SpongeBob until I realized she'd been watching it at daycare all along. I only make one meal, and they eat or they don't (unless it's just unreasonable food for a toddler that I'm dying to eat). I feed them generally healthy food, and stick to the rules I make. So where does this slacker within come from? Is it the tiredness that creeps up and sucks away our ability to make conscious and wise decisions? Or is it our patience, weened away little by little through the day until we have nothing left? Or, is it we simply think, screw it; my first kid turned out fine, this one will turn out great too, even if I don't do everything perfect. Even if I can't do everything perfect.
My husband gave me a huge grin this morning as if to say "Ha, ha, you gave in! If that was me, you'd be giving me hell! Now what are you going to do?" Actually, I'm pretty sure he said some of those words. I smiled back as though I was prepared; I had a plan. Now I must improvise when we get home for bedtime. But, if there's one thing I know as moms we do well...it's improvise! ~ Trina
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