Facing Your Fears (and Why It's Important)

As I’ve written already, Mexico was a complete blast.  It was everything I’d imagined and more…and since I’m quite the optimist this is saying a lot!

Before I even went on my trip, I decided I was going to zipline.  Since with each year of age I've become more frightened of anything above the second story of my home, this is a big deal.  You see, I used to be the girl who took chances.  I was the one who was never afraid of anything, and if I was, I sure wasn’t going to admit it!

I remember getting a tongue ring on a trip to Wyoming with a group of girlfriends who were also supposed to get them.  The lady was cracked out and apparently up on an night meth-binge…but I didn’t care.  I said I was doing it, and by God, I was doing it.  So I went first and guess what…I was the only one who went home with a tongue ring.  Hey, I didn’t blame my friends, I was crazy!

Or, the first trip to Mexico I took where I went para-sailing.  I had to be the first one to go as my friends were all skeptical.  And I didn’t act the least bit scared when the driver of the boat almost sent my flying into a group of buildings on the beach on my descent back.

Somehow, after birthing two children I’ve decided I’m a scaredy cat.  I don’t go on the huge water slides at the parks.  I don’t even ride the roller coasters anymore…my old favorite!  It’s like now I have two very small beings I’m responsible for, and I don’t want to do anything crazy.  Period!  The interest is no longer there to prove I’m the tough girl.  It drives my husband crazy!  He misses the old me.

So, you see my point at the wildness of deciding to zipline…and then on top of that, rappelling from 70 feet in the air.  But, as I try to soar upwards with my dreams, I realize I have to face my fears.  I can’t run from things that scare me anymore; I have to face them head on. 

So, there I went up what seemed like a billion flights of rickety wooden stairs (in the wind, mind you), in the middle of the jungle.  With each step the fear was crawling up, threatening to engulf and nearly immobilize me.  But, I kept on to the top.  I watched Shannon step off the platform of the tower, backwards, secured by only a rope and with a smile on face.  I kept thinking, go back Trina-this is crazy.

But, I didn’t go back.  I didn’t look down.  I stepped off the edge with my heart racing, hoping I wouldn’t plummet down to my most certain death, and rappelled the 70 feet without a hitch.  Ziplining came next-it was much easier.  I felt free, flying over the beautiful jungle and who knows how fast…not a care in the world.

You see I overcame a major obstacle that day…I decided that nothing is going to stop me…ever.  I’m going to take my fears and face my hurdles head on, ready to jump.  Nothing and no one is going to get in the way of me achieving what I want in this wonderful journey we call life.  It may get scary at times, but as I learned, I can handle fear and ultimately turn it to triumph.   ~Trina

Saving Marriages & Self - A Book That Changes Lives

I began reading Laura Munson’s “This Is Not The Story You Think It Is-A Season of Unlikely Happiness” on a warm Charleston evening in late March, the windows finally opened allowing a warm breeze to dance past the curtains. I couldn’t have known at that moment that this book would serve as my personal reference guide for one of the more challenging years of my life.  How could I know that highlighted passages from that first read would keep me coming back throughout the year to remind me how to fight for my marriage even when we weren’t acting like partners; to focus on inner peace and freedom; and to enjoy my children while not forgetting my own passions in life.

Last night, an unseasonably cold night in October, I found myself flipping through pages scouring for the encouraging messages that meant something to me throughout this year.  When I came across the line, “That’s what this book is all about.  Maybe it will help people. Maybe even save some marriages…” I realized the importance of sharing such a treasure to all the women I can be in touch with.   If this book has served as such a comfort to me, then surely some of you will find her discoveries and experiences as soul-saving as I have.

Whether your current challenge involves resentment towards your husband who seems to be disconnecting from you, career woes, balancing raising a family with holding on to you, or just looking for happiness – you will find endless inspiration in this memoir. 

Seeking true happiness? Stepping up to a new challenge?  Fighting for you?  Here are some tidbits from her book:

·         “This simple truth: the end of suffering happens with the end of wanting.  The end of wanting.”

·         “It’s when you stop wanting things outside of your control that you’ll be happy.”

·         “’The only difference between being published and not being published,” he said, “is being published.”

·         “…we’re still a family. Even when we mess up.  We love each other and we protect each other. And we forgive…”

·         “For anyone in any situation in which one is tempted to go into panic mode, or worse, victim mode, rather than taking responsibility for one’s own well-being.”

·         “Happiness only comes from within.”

·         “The biggest fight, though, is the part where I keep myself happy.  Where I don’t take him personally.”

·         “Follow your instincts. You are going to be okay, no matter what.”

·         “I believe when we act powerfully, we get treated powerfully.”

·         “Finally, I know. You get to the end of suffering. Or you don’t. That’s it.  You Choose.”

If you identify with any of the above quotes, I insist you read her book.  She writes as if she is talking to you, as if she knows exactly what you’re experiencing.  If you find it half as helpful as I did, I will know I’ve done my job as a sister…and a woman…passing on this invaluable resource.  Ladies, go grab a glass of wine, snuggle up with this book and be happy we’re all in this together!