Toddler Tantrum Bumped Family From Flight

The heat rising up in your face. The tears forming behind your eyelids. The sound; piercing.

When your two-year-old has a tantrum, it can feel like the most embarrassing moment in your life. Especially when dozens of spectators surround you and your tot.  You'll try all the tricks in the book, and sometimes it just doesn't work. Your toddler has a mind of her own and she will decide when the tantrum is over.  We've all seen this in action.  When the heated moment begins, often without warning; you'll start with We don't act like that. Please be a big girl. The pitch gets higher. You try the You better stop this RIGHT NOW or you lose your [Enter: your child's favorite toy]. She's not moved. She's not listening-everyone else is. And you want to hide, but you're in charge and everyone is waiting for you to just DO SOMETHING! Your husband tries a few of his tricks.  Nothing.  In desperation, you beg If you stop crying, I'll give you a piece of [Enter: your child's favorite tasty treat]. And it feels like it lasts forever. Then you've done it; you've calmed your child down.  Or at least you think you had something to do with it.  At last, peace.

Then you're escorted off the plane.

The story of Dr. Colette Vieau and husband, Dr. Mordecai Stolk's experience on JetBlue was featured on NBC's The Today Show this morning.  What really made me feel for this family though (you can only feel so bad for a family leaving a Turks and Caicos vacation), was not so much their airline debacle, but the six minutes on live television with Matt Lauer.  If you ever have the chance to speak with Mr. Lauer on TV, chances are you're either hoping to leave the kiddos behind or you're praying they will behave extraordinarily!

Through the segment, I was holding my breath for the mom.  As pediatrician Dr. Vieau spoke about the tantrum, her three-year-old daughter squirmed and wiggled and twisted on her lap. I know this situation well.  Your child wants to be anywhere but your lap; but you're trying to hold an adult conversation at the bank, in the grocery store or even your pediatrician's office and at the very least, you want to look like you have control over this young child. But her older daugther was grabbing for her dad, reaching for his face, and even at one point worked her way down off her mom's lap to the set’s couch and was reaching for the coffee table.

Matt Lauer asked if the couple thought the experience to be mortifying which the dad quickly rebutted, "yes!" after giving a dad-voice "hey" to his fidgety daughter. Meanwhile, the culprit of the airline tantrum, their two-year-old sitting pretty on dad's lap, was behaving very well with just some little toddler talk.

This is just life with little ones.  Especially when you have a two-year-old and a three-year-old...trying to control them both is often a tricky task.

When asked what lesson was learned from this experience, Dr. Stolk stated, "Control your kids." To that I say, "pa ha!"  If a pediatrician can't "control" a child in the midst of a tantrum, who can?  Of course, there is always an end to a tantrum but how much of it is the parent controlling it or the child deciding she's done?

I think the lesson learned is that none of us are immune to toddler tantrums.  And we all survive them...no matter how embarrassing they are at the time!

The NBC Today Show segment can be seen here.

Toddlers Eating Habits - Just Enough To Keep A Baby Bird Alive?

My child just doesn’t eat.  My husband and I actually read the little sheet the pediatrician gives you; you know the one their assistant prints from some random googled site between her Facebook posts.  It reads “a toddler is only expected to eat as much as a baby bird.”  Check!  We’re good!  That is precisely how much our two-year-old is eating. 

I know what he likes.  At least, this week.  He loves him some green beans and broccoli (no, really!)  And pineapple and raisins.  And beef…taco meat, burger bites, even steak—my diet the first four weeks of his existence in my belly, thanks to many business meetings in Kansas City.  In fact, the first person to know I was pregnant, other than myself, was my KC cabbie shuttling me to the airport the morning my stick showed two pink lines. 

   My husband and I were in agreement that we wouldn’t be those parents–the parents who’d cook up chicken korma with a side of mango chutney and naan just to feed our offspring hot dogs and mac and cheese.  And we aren’t…yet.  We serve a meal and they are expected to eat it.  If they don’t, I guess they’ll figure it out by the next meal that they should eat what they’re served.  However, the trick doesn’t seem to be working.  He doesn’t flinch.  He still doesn’t eat.  He seems to not have eaten a bite.

   Yet, there are those meals where they throw down.  I get such delight in seeing them polish off an entire plate.  I feel accomplished.  Finally, my trice-daily attempt at balanced meals including a protein, grain, vegetable and dairy product (almost always their sippy of milk).  And then it seems he doesn’t eat again for a week.  Still, I take such pride in those fleeting moments.  I take into account the snacks I’d given through the course of the day.  Goldfish seem like the biggest culprit.  Or maybe just milk.  I feel blessed with the fact that they do enjoy the beverage of choice for little men.  But, maybe too much is simply too much when their little bodies are in need of other vitamins and minerals.

   As his primary caregiver, I know I’m presenting him with a nice balance and constantly trying to rework our menu to find something he’ll eat, something that sticks for a while.  There is only so much you can do.  We weigh in healthy at our checkups.  In fact, he is 90th percentile in weight and height, so something is nourishing him.  So, how does he poop?  Cause he poops…today he pooped three times.  I really haven’t figured that one out yet… 

   So, if you’re confident you’re providing a balance of healthy options and they are eating, they are pooping and they are growing, then maybe, in fact, they are eating as much as they need, even if it’s just enough to keep a baby bird alive.   

Another Embarrassing Pediatrician Story

It was that time of year, and I was at the office for my four-year-old’s well-baby visit.  The questions were the same thing they’d always been, so I was used to them.  The doctors always wanted to know how my kids were sleeping, eating, drinking and pooping. 

   “Make sure she’s getting enough fiber and fruits and grains,” Callie’s new pediatrician told me in a serious voice, as though this was my first time.

   I was almost too quick to respond. “Oh, you don’t have to worry about that,” I said proudly.  “We eat a lean protein, whole grain and veggie with nearly every meal.  My family eats extremely healthy.”

   It was something I could honestly brag about; even my husband complained about the consistent health-friendly dishes on the menu at our house.
      “That’s great news! I love to hear it.  Callie, what is your favorite food?”  The doctor pressed my daughter, an all-knowing smile on her face.

   Without even hesitating, Callie responded enthusiastically, “Cheetos and marshmallows!”

~Trina